God’s Love Language and A Caged in Heart: Can both Coincide?

5 love lang

A while ago I took the love language quiz to refresh my memory on my dominate love languages. Not that I didn’t know how I liked to be loved but because I wanted to see if it had changed over the years…and it really hasn’t. There are 5 categories according to Gary Chapman and my love language, in order from highest to lowest, is (1) Quality Time, (2) Physical Touch, (3) Words of Affirmation, (4) Receiving Gifts, and (5) Acts of Service. These are spot on with the order as well. I am very high on the first 3. Yes, I love gifts (what woman doesn’t want to be spoiled?) and people doing things for me but for some reason the whole “action’s speak louder than words” doesn’t really satisfy me unless the action is spending quality time with me :-). Yes, show me you love me but I also need to hear it…but that’s just me 🙂

Any who, I have found that often times you can tell a person’s love language by the way they give love. Now this of course becomes a challenge when you have 2 people together and the way 1 receives love isn’t the same as the way the other gives love (That’s why communication of your needs/wants are important). I became increasingly aware of this while hanging out with different people. I began to notice that I was most drawn to people who also had Quality Time as their #1 or #2 love language. We connect so well because they get my love language and I get there’s.

So as I was sitting in my War Room the other day the thought crossed my mind of what God’s love language would be if He were to take the quiz too. It may be different for other people but based on MY relationship with Him I would say His order would be (1) Physical Touch, (2) Quality Time, (3) Words of Affirmation, (4) Receiving Gifts, and (5) Acts of Service.

So basically we speak the same language, lol! That’s funny though because I wrote His order without having my order in mind. Our # 1 and #2 are swapped but essentially it’s the same.

So here are the reasons I put them in this order:

I often feel God’s TOUCH on a daily basis. The way that He touches me is through a warm sensation in my hands, belly, or certain body parts depending on what He is trying to tell me. Then, QUALITY TIME would be next because He looovees spending time with me. 🙂 Because He is so deep in love with me He wants to spend every waking and sleeping moment with me! What a sweet man right!?! He often calls me to my prayer room to spend time with Him and even in the midst of my busy days He calls me to take 5 minutes to soak in His presence!

“8 Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.” – James 4:8

God longs to be with you. He longs to touch you. He longs to be with you in your happy, sad, painful, joyful, etc…moments…He doesn’t just want to see you when you are happy. He wants ALL of you. I love those songs He wants it all by Forever Jones and How He Loves Us by Jesus Culture/Kim Walker; they both depict how “thirsty” God is for us. LOL. Yes, GOD IS THIRSTY FOR YOU!!!

Then, He loves when I give Him WORDS OF AFFIRMATION and tell Him how beautiful, holy, marvelous, wonderful, amazing, and dreamy He is too me! He already knows how AWESOME He is but He still loves to hear it from me! Wouldn’t you?! It is always interesting to me when people say “well I thought that about you” or “So and so said these great things about you”…and that is all nice and dandy but it really doesn’t mean as much if you haven’t told ME! So that is how God is. Yes, He knows you tell all your choir memories “aint He alright” but when’s the last time you told Him how COOL He was!?

I put RECEIVING GIFTS AND ACTS OF SERVICE last because He cares more about our intimate relationship than what I DO for Him. YESSSS, He does expect me to give my 1st to Him in tithes and He wants me to serve others because then I am serving Him BUT all of that doesn’t matter if our relationship is shaky!! (See I Corinthians).

Just think about it [ladies]….if you and your man have been fussing for the past month there ain’t no amount of roses that’s going to make you TRULY happy! It might cause you to smirk but you will be MOST happy when the relationship is back on one accord!!! So I’m not sure where men got the whole idea of…”if she is mad then buy her something!”…Well actually that may work for women whose love language is receiving gifts…so I partially will retract the last comment…BUT it doesn’t work for those whose love language is NOT that. Just fyi. 🙂


I share all of this to ask you if you know what God’s love language is in your own personal relationship with Him? Are you so busy DOING for Him when all He really wants is to spend time with you? Are you so busy trying to BUY His love when all He really wants is a touch from you?



Well I’m glad you asked. It is very simple. A caged in heart is a heart that blocks love from coming in and often blocks true love from flowing out. It is difficult to connect with, spend time with and touch a heart that has been wounded and locked away! A caged in heart rarely will listen to any positive words of affirmation about it and it is skeptical to receive help or even gifts from others without thinking somebody has ulterior motives.

If a caged in heart blocks love…then a caged in heart blocks God.

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Click here to learn more about my new book The Caged in Heart: How Your Childhood Wounds are Affecting Your Adult Life.

Pre-Order your copy today if you no longer want to block love and God!

Also check out the book trailer


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